Where I will be
Quite often I will be in the G-Books tent which is being run by Hymns Ancient and Modern (company that includes Church Times, Church House Bookshop, etc). Some of the time I will be behind a table explaining the intricacies of subscribing to the Church Times to enquirers and passers-by. There will be an exhibition of cartoons (laminated), including ones that haven’t appeared in any of the books. Do come and say hello.

Signing
I have nothing to sign, and will be signing it in G-Books at the following time: Sunday, 1.30pm. Bring plaster casts, copies of Rob Bell books, etc. Alternatively my books, greetings cards (five designs) and 2012 calendar will be available and I will scribble on them thereby reducing second hand resale value by approximately 25%.

T-shirts
An exciting development. A t-shirt with a cartoon of mine on will be available for the first time. Images can be seen down below (these are photoshopped pictures showing what the t-shirt would look like if worn by a theoretical model who only exists in photoshop). The t-shirts will be available in quite limited numbers and I have been told they will cost £10 and come in blue, grey, and white. All shapes, sizes, and colours are ethical. Staff will have one with ‘Staff’ written on it. I’d buy one sooner rather than later to be sure of getting your preferred size and colour. No one knows whether they will sell or not, hence limited numbers.

Site map
People have been asking me how to get hold of my hand-drawn festival map (from which the t-shirt cartoon is taken – sort of). If you are not a Greenbelt Angel (they already have them) look out for people like me giving out the ‘Guide to Greenbelt’ on Friday evening, or come to the G-Books / Church Times tent and pick one up (free).

T-shirt cartoon:

T-shirt worn by hypothetical model

Cartoon exhibitions
This (above) is a picture from one I did in Southminster the other week. I paid some members of the public to look interested. I’m very willing to come and talk and/or exhibit cartoons elsewhere – contact my agent for details. Or, upon discovering that I don’t have one, contact me.

Christian Marketplace review
Another very kind review of the book, this time in Christian Marketplace magazine by (I assume) Clem Jackson. I particularly enjoyed: “If you have friends who think church is dull and boring… then this might just settle their minds once and for all”. You can find it via this page, or this direct link to the page-turning copy. Page 11.

Church Times book chart
Pleased to see that the book is number 3 this week. Thanks everyone!

Christian New Media Awards
The cheeky rodent dessertblogger the Church Mousse has got his paws on the confidential shortlists for the Christian Blog Awards. Good Heavens – our combined 110% efforts have paid off thus far. Thanks everyone!

Christian New Media Conference
I’m going. Are you? If so let’s go for a drink afterwards.

Church Times cartoon award
The Church Times is probably the most cartoon-friendly publication in the UK (besides Private Eye), and it is their support that has enabled me to do what I do. I’m pleased therefore that they have been recognised by the Professional Cartoonists Association, an organisation that I might have joined had I been better with paperwork. A report (and slightly risqué cartoon) is here.

One final Greenbelt cartoon before I get back talking about other things.

If you were at the festival you may or may not also be interested in the lists of my Last Orders cartoons and Church Times exhibition cartoons.

This is my last-but-one Greenbelt post, I promise. One or two people have asked me how they can get hold of some of the cartoons that appeared in the Church Times cartoon exhibition at Greenbelt. Well, here is a reasonably accurate list, along with links to the book in which each diagram can be found (in most cases the new one). The cartoons that don’t have a book title next to them are too new to be in the latest volume, and all being well will appear in the next one at some future date.

I’ve subdivided them into the smaller cartoons and bigger ones, just in case you can’t remember what the cartoon was about but remember the size of paper it was on. Yes, unlikely I know.

Prints and other kinds of merchandise aren’t available but are currently being considered, so let me know where your interests lie.

At the moment I don’t think that any of these cartoons appear on this site, but they will begin to before too long. If you have any further questions put your hand up and an invigilator will be along shortly.

Larger cartoons (A3)

Leaving church (Church Times, My Pew – Things I have seen from it)
Making notes (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Tents (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Discernment process (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
The secularists (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Sunday school (Church Times)
The Christian conference (Church Times)
The ladders in the north transept (Church Times)
Conscientious objectors (Church Times)
The periodic table of churchgoers (Church Times)

Smaller cartoons (A4)

Information for visitors (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Volunteer transport (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Parish computer (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Health and safety (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Awkward pastoral visits (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Parish life (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Games (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Sound desk operator (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Beating the crowds (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Social committee (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Rotas (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
New year’s eve (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Differing heights (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Loyalty cards (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Routes taken (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
Press officers (Church Times)
The vicarage (Church Times)
People in cassocks (Church Times)
Long serving parishioners (Church Times)
The new PCC (Church Times)
School assemblies (Church Times)
The bell ringers (Church Times)

[Image above: Extract from 'Beating the crowds', taken from The Exciting World of Churchgoing.]

Greenbelt 2010 has come to an end. I’ve had a marvellous time as usual. This year it was mainly (for me at least) about hanging around and chatting to people, my new book, the Church Times cartoon exhibition, and my nightly appearances in Last Orders, the late night comedy show.

The latter took up the most time and caused the most anxiety, but I loved doing it. I’m hugely grateful to have been given the opportunity. Hopefully I’ll get to do more of my slightly peculiar brand of ‘cartoon stand-up’ in the future.

I thought it might be quite useful for people who attended Last Orders to know how they can get hold of some of the cartoons, and so I’ve put together a list of the diagrams I used each night, links to their online location if there is one, and where they originally appeared. In particular I’ve listed the book (if any) that each cartoon is taken from, although in some cases the version I showed was not quite the original version. I’m afraid that these lists may appear a little nonsensical to anyone who wasn’t there as there were other bits of text in-between.

I’m aiming to do something similar with the cartoon exhibition cartoons in the next few days.

Friday, Part I of IV: Things you needed to know before you got here
The parable of the Greenbelters (New material)
How to analyse your camping neighbours – originally Tents (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
How to recognise your tent (Church Times Guide to Greenbelt 2007)
How to recognise your tent in the dark (Church Times Guide to Greenbelt 2007)

Saturday, Part II of IV: What to expect at the Greenbelt Sunday Service
The Peace (Church Times, The Dave Walker Guide to the Church)
Journey of the collection plates (The Dave Walker Guide to the Church)
The Sermon (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
Communion (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
After-service coffee (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
Suggested ways to behave, originally ‘How to make it known (The Dave Walker Guide to the Church)
The all-age service (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
How to tell what is going on (Church Times, The Dave Walker Guide to the Church)

Sunday, Part III of IV: Things you will have already found out by now
How to queue for a talk in a sensible fashion (previously unpublished as far as I can remember)
Returning to the campsite for lunch (Church Times Guide to Greenbelt 2005)
Taking something to sit on (Various places, including here and Church Times Guide to Greenbelt 2005)
Flagpoles (Church Times Guide to Greenbelt 2005)
Meeting people that you have not seen for a number of years (new material)
The programme for young people (new material)
How to recognise Greenbelters (new material)
The church party, originally New Year’s Eve (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)

Monday, Part IV of IV: What to do now that you have become enthusiastic about Christianity
Church picture, originally It is not about the numbers (My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
The welcomers (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
The welcome pack (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)
Will anyone notice that I am there, originally Numbers (Church Times, The Exciting World of Churchgoing)
The five worst places to sit, originally Pews (Church Times, My Pew: Things I have seen from it)

Launch of ‘The Exciting World of Churchgoing’

My new book, The Exciting World of Churchgoing will be available at the Greenbelt Festival and quite possibly in the shops this week. Hooray!

It is the third book of my Church Times ‘Guide to the Church’ cartoons. There’s no launch party planned. Perhaps I should organise one. Bit late really as people won’t have time to hire all of the formal kit etc.

[Aside: You can (when it becomes available) get the book via your local Christian bookshop, or via Amazon, Church House Bookshop, Waterstones or the publishers, Canterbury Press.]

Nightly appearance at Last Orders

This is the most exciting but most terrifying thing in the world for me at the moment. I will be showing some cartoons and doing some very limited talking in ‘Last Orders‘ on each night, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday. Last Orders starts at 11pm and is in the 2000 seater ‘Centaur’ venue, and other people on the bill include proper comedians like Milton Jones. Oh dear, what have I got myself into? On the plus side, whenever I have done these things before I have loved doing them and people have found them quite enjoyable and there has been some polite applause at the end.

No, I haven’t prepared it yet.

Cartoon Exhibition in the Church Times Tent

Some of my latest diagrams and some from the book will be on display in the Church Times tent. These will include ones like ‘The Periodic Table of Churchgoers’ which have thus far not been widely available beyond the newspaper.

The Church Times tent is in front of the grandstand. This year the tent has swapped places with the ‘Hub’ Literature venue as the Church Times was found to be on dodgy ground. By implication this means that the Literature is now on dodgy ground. This is a conundrum I haven’t yet got to the bottom of.

Map of Greenbelt in the ‘Church Times Guide to Greenbelt’

Every year I do a map of the festival site and moan about how difficult it is to draw for weeks on end to anyone who will listen. You can get hold of it in the free Church Times Guide to Greenbelt, available from the Church Times tent or from touts (ie me) who will be handing it out.

Loitering

When not doing other things I’ll generally be hanging around in the Church Times tent pretending to help. Do come and say hello, and perhaps we can meet up for a cup of tea or beer. Not too much beer though, as I must be alert during the evenings.

Other

I think I might be part of some comics thing. I don’t really know about that.

I was clicking around the internet, and the next thing you know have booked to go to the Spring Harvest Christian seaside conference in Skegness, April 11-16 (Week ‘two’ to those in the know).

Anyone else going? Lets meet up! I don’t know if I’ll be blogging or cartooning or anything. I might just draw huge diagrams in the shingle on the beach that will be washed away by the incoming tide, thereby demonstrating their ultimate futility.

[Cartoon originally posted on the Church Times Blog sometime around here, when I did my in-depth analysis of being at the event.]

I am secretly quite pleased with a series of photos I took on Wednesday: The Christian Resources Exhibition in photographs. (The page has a bitly address too in case you are a Tweetist: http://bit.ly/15iKx4 )

See you there perhaps if you’re there. Otherwise I intend to post some updates during the day on the Church Times blog, or failing that, Twitter (@davewalker).

A quick “shout out” (as they say amongst young people) to the unexpected clergy I saw on Wednesday: David Stone, Woody, Dave Warnock, Mark Hendley, and others.

This year our plans have changed somewhat, as at the time of writing I’m still not feeling that great healthwise. For the first year since I started going (which was, I think, 1999) the campervan will be staying at home and we will not be going a day early to camp at a highly secret Gloucestershire location ready to queue up at 10am at Cheltenham Racecourse on Friday morning. We (that’s my wife and I) are still planning to go, but have decided that staying in a hotel would be a better option for someone who doesn’t quite know how much of the Festival he’s going to feel like going to.

Our traditional Wibsite meet will still be happening (latest info here) but not at the usual venue. The plan is currently the beer tent tiny tea tent at 4.30 on Saturday – hopefully word will get around if there is any change.

I hope to be in the Church Times tent for some time over the weekend. The tent is to host a cartoon exhibition featuring work by the different Church Times cartoonists. If, on the off-chance, you had any interest in ‘My Pew‘ and/or the 2009 calendar then it is rumoured that they will be available.

Also available in the tent will be the Church Times Guide to Greenbelt, a free… well… guide to Greenbelt. I don’t really know what will be in it, but it is just possible that it might include a map of the site in a style you might recognise.

All being well I will be writing about the Festival on the Church Times blog (link). I’ve even gone so far as to organise a press pass so that I can go and make use of an electrical socket in the press room as my super-duper miniature mobile festival-blogging laptop with-added-dongle has a battery life of about half an hour. This (CartoonChurch) blog may go fairly quiet until after the weekend as I will be concentrating my efforts on the Church Times one.

Of course my involvement is subject to my being up and about, which I really hope I will be as Greenbelt is usually the highlight of my year. I’m determined to be there for some of it even if I have to crawl around on hands and/or knees. I’ll look forward to seeing some of you there – do come and say hello if you see me loitering or indeed crawling around in the aforementioned manner.

The CartoonChurch stand in the Lambeth Conference Marketplace will open on Monday for the best part of two weeks. It will be open from 11am until 9pm most days except Thursday 24 July.

This is the stand in its pre-setup state. As you can see I asked for the following fittings to be installed:

• Two folding chairs
• One collapsible church hall table
• One basketball hoop with attached large white mechanism thing
• One small cardboard box
• One sheet of A4 paper

Overall I think the staff have done remarkably well, don’t you?

Please feel free to use the comments to suggest how we might be able to use this assorted equipment. Remember that we need to communicate the ethos of the organisation and sell lots of books.

[Marketplace helpers: Sorry for lack of communication with some of you. I will send you some final information shortly.]