Warning: If you have no interest in Twitter, the well known internet timewasting service, and Christianity, the well known religion, you will find this post dull and an utter irrelevance.
The Twurch of England is the Church of England on Twitter. The bishops, the clergy, and the… hang on… it’s only the bishops and the clergy! The laity (ordinary people) are nowhere to be found. This is an unjust state of affairs which sends out the message that the ordinary people are not as important as the bishops and clergy. Being mildly deeply upset about this I started a ‘Reform the Twurch’ campaign yesterday – you can read all of the tweets on the subject via the hashtag #reformthetwurch. It was great fun and a most creative protest. Proceedings were conducted calmly and peacefully, and from time to time nuns came out and brought us tea.
Of course there are other Anglicans not in the CofE, and other denominations of Christians who are also not a part of this group. I certainly think it would be good to include these people, although I understand that the ‘Twurch of England’ may not be the most appropriate banner under which to gather them. Perhaps there needs to be an ‘Anglican Twits’ (Anglicans who aren’t CofE) group, and one for ‘UK Twistians’ (UK Christians whether they are Anglican or not). I suspect forming a ‘World Christians’ group might be rather more time consuming.
My challenges to Twurch administrators (The Church Moose and Peter O) are as follows:
1) First of all I think you really need to include CofE laity if you are to go on calling it the Twurch of England. It’s OK, there aren’t many of us and we’re declining in number all the time.
2) Secondly, I understand that you may want to restrict membership of the Twurch of England to members of the Church of England. However, if you don’t find a way to include the wider groups of people (Anglicans, UK Christians) in some way I suspect someone else will. There is an opportunity for a creative individual to form the Anglican Twitter community or the Christian Twitter community, and sooner or later someone will do so.
The picture above has nothing to do with this post by the way. I just didn’t have anything else to put in.
Now… stop trying to distract me – I’ve got work to do. My big important project went a bit better yesterday, for which I am thankful.
I have minor regrets about this cartoon as it has given the ‘I hate bishops – they can do nothing right’ brigade who loiter on Anglican blogs something to jump up and down about.
On the other hand blogger Matt Wardman says: “Sorry, Dave – not as well judged as usual in my view”. To blogger Matt Wardman I say that normally I do not knowingly judge things that well, I just draw the first thing that comes into my head. Also I am asking a question about the activities of the bishops and was not prejudging the answer to that question. I am perfectly prepared to accept that they had more important things to be doing if that turns out to be the case. Bishop David Walker, whom I have great respect for (not least because he is my namesake and has done much to make the wearing of sandals acceptable in polite society), says that “most bishops are relaxed about the Ali amendment” and I can understand why that might be the case.
PS. I bet some idiot will try to register pectoralcrosses4u.com.
Questions have been raised about my appearance on Simon’s Dark Side of the Moon Chaplaincy blog.
Also has anyone ever actually met Dave Walker, in his photos he looks tall and thin…is he? There is a reason for my asking.
I have been trying to work out what these reasons might be. Either the chaplaincy students are planning to knit me a jumper, or the Diocese of Winchester are seeking information about me for a soon-to-be-released photo fit ‘wanted’ poster after my Church Times Blog posts (1,2,3) about the fact they are ceasing to fund Simon’s post. This will mean that unless other initiatives are taken (which they are being) Southampton University will more or less the only university in the UK to be un-pastorally*-cared-for by the Anglicans. Read the whole saga on Simon’s blog and if you want to support his cause join the Facebook group from where news is being posted.
Back to what I look like: So far responses on Simon’s blog suggest that I am “grey-looking and two-dimensional” or, by the Mad Priest: “Dave Walker looks like a geek from a Hollywood teen movie.”
In order to lay these allegations to rest I submit a recent self portrait that proves I am indeed tall and thin:
Whilst I’m here: Thanks for not giving up on this blog. I haven’t been writing it for several reasons. Partly because I’m currently in a continual state of being behind schedule with my diagrams and I’m convinced that the people to whom I owe the work will be continually scanning the internet to see that I’m not frittering my time away. My time therefore needs to be frittered away in other less public ways. There are other reasons too. But I need to remind myself that i do actually quite enjoy writing here, so I will endeavour to post a bit more, starting, I think, with a calendar giveaway in the next day or two.
I’ve been having some good ‘Anglican goings-on’ times at General Synod in London over the last couple of days. I’ve been blogging and posting a few cartoons on my Church Times blog and Twittering every now and then. Hopefully a couple more cartoons will follow tomorrow.
Do say hello if you’re there and see me around. I can be contacted via the usual mobile number or CartoonChurch number, 07806 334077.
This afternoon I had the opportunity to present a cartoon canvas to the Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr Rowan Williams. The cartoon is ‘the parish system‘. The Archbishop has visited my cartoon tent on several occasions over the course of the Lambeth Conference and this was one picture that he had enjoyed.
As you may have picked up I am a great fan of the Archbishop, so to be given this chance was a highlight of what has already been for me a really quite overwhelming conference. The handing over of the canvas was originally planned for 14.30 in the cartoon tent, but in light of the Archbishop’s time commitments today the venue was moved to his flat / office and the time to 16.50. My wife and one of the official conference photographers came with me. The picture makes it look as if part of the image is missing, but that is just the sunlight shining behind the canvas.
Tomorrow is the final plenary session followed by a service in Canterbury Cathedral. I go home on Monday.
If you’re interested in my writings about Anglican goings-on you can tune in via the Church Times blog. There should be some new cartoon material posted there in the coming weeks too.
I’ve posted a cartoon about Bishop Gene Robinson’s non-invitation to the Lambeth Conference on the Church Times blog. Also a brief observation on the fact that Wesley Owen are to be the official bookshop of the conference.
Don’t worry – I’m not going to write something here every time I make a Church Times post. But I might sometimes say something here when I’ve drawn a new cartoon, especially during these first few weeks whilst there are people wandering aimlessly up and down the corridors trying to work out where my cartoons are and which room they are supposed to be after the coffee break.
As you’ll have noticed I haven’t been commenting and drawing much about Anglican goings-on. This is a temporary state of affairs. But I couldn’t resist making one or two insignificant remarks about the fact that the ‘Gafcon’ alternative Lambeth Conference has been rearranged so that the ‘political’ bit is now only for invited dignatories. You’ll need to go elsewhere for in-depth analysis of course, but just one or two things that I noticed:
I had a great time at General Synod on Wednesday. Apart from meeting various people it was absolutely fascinating just to watch the general goings-on. I was there as a guest of a future client, and whilst I wasn’t directly doing any drawing I did make plenty of notes. The diagram above is a raw sketch (unlike my normal highly-polished diagrams).
One of the excitements of this particular Synod was the introduction of new electronic voting devices which I imagine are a bit like the ones they use on ‘Who wants to be a millionaire’ and other such shows. On Monday the Synod was given training and some practice votes were held. Alastair Cutting, whose Synod blog has lots of synodical happenings, has blogged about it:
A practise vote was set up on Monday – a ‘vote of the whole house’ that ‘This synod ask the Business Committee to acknowledge Valentine’s Day’ was passed by a significant majority of the whole Synod.
However a following motion, a ‘vote by houses’, that ‘Valentine’s Day be celebrated by each bishop buying chocolates for their diocesan representatives at Synod’, was passed by both of the lower houses, but the House of Bishops voted it down. Because ‘votes by houses’ require a majority in each house to be passed, it meant that bishops were let off the hook from buying their diocesan representatives chocolate for Valentine’s Day. But, woe betide any bishops who do not…!
Meanwhile, whilst I was observing I wa also being observed. Peter Ould, who was watching my every involuntary movement:
Finally, a big thank you to Dave Walker, who (even if you didn’t realise it) entertained me by being sat across the gallery from me and moving his head in slight motions every so often. I know you’re concentrating hard on cartoons and the like Dave, but you ain’t half amusing when you get a good idea!!!
Thanks Peter. I had no idea I did that, but now when I need an idea I will move my head in slight motions and see what happens.
Valentine sweethearts can tie the knot for free at a Chelmsford church. Romantic Rev Tim Ball, vicar of Holy Trinity Springfield, believes that marriage is best. So he’s waiving the cost of the service, the choir, the organist, the verger and the heating.
And the good news is that the offer will be available throughout the year.
“My church believes that marriage is best for couples, for children and for the community,” says big-hearted Tim.
“So we have put our money where our mouth is. We will pay all the costs of the service in the church. We are offering a free marriage service to parishioners because Holy Trinity is a good place to celebrate love and commitment.”
Presumably the organist, choir, verger and the man who turns the handle on the boiler have been consulted.
Before you all rush off to get married there I should make you aware of the small print. One of you has to live in the parish or you have to be ‘full and regular members’. Not full or regular, full and regular. It’s both/and, not either/or. There is also a marriage preparation evening which must be attended and an optional 8 week ‘bolt-on’ course all about ‘the basics of the Christian faith and what it means for today’.
In the unlikely event that you meet these criteria and happen to want to get married this year and happen to be a reader of this blog – what are you waiting for? Give the ‘Romantic Rev’ a call.
Update: I asked Rev Tim how they could afford to do it and he has kindly got back to me. Everyone is being paid as per usual. The church has made a decision to foot the bill. Here’s a section of his response:
These are our points for doing it. (I would say that we are doing it for people who live in our parish – it is not for the whole world.)
We want to say how important we think marriage is, best for couples, best for children, best for society.
We want to express our faith in generous giving – we don’t want to say we will ‘do it for Free’ – but that we will ‘pay for it’ because we have to pay the fees to the diocese, to the organist and for the verger etc, – so it is not just a case of not collecting the fee payable to the PCC.
We would like to highlight the fact that the Christian marriage service expresses a higher ideal of committed love than any other wedding service.
We hope we might encourage couples who aren’t married to consider it, or even to do it.
We want to put our money where our mouth is – in that sense it is sacrificial, we see it as an investment in the kind of society we would like to see as bearing the marks of the kingdom of God.
The not- quite- daily internet column of Dave Walker. Dave is a freelance cartoonist who also writes and draws for the Church Times. (
Especially like the "thistles"!
Posted by Dave at 10:13 am on March 26, 2010 and filed under Anglican bloggers, Anglican goings-on, Blogging, Church, Ecumenical matters, Religion. 
