Christmas cartoon ideas

33 Responses to “Christmas cartoon ideas”

1. Sara says:
   

   Things for the Christmas tree (I should be finishing my own blog posts right now…) Teabags from the tea brewers. Dusters from the cleaners. Cleverly arranged flowers from the flower ladies. A chain of numbers from the person who puts the hymn numbers up. Woggles from the scouts.

   December 7th, 2010 at 10:43 pm
2. Sara says:
   

   Christmas things that baffle me: Cheesy cash-in compilation albums and perfume adverts. I’m not sure that those are very cartoonish, they are just things that baffle me. That and the sheer amount of christmassy tat that seems to appear from places. Perhaps there is a giant underground vault where it all goes between January and October.

   December 7th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
3. WhyNotSmile says:
   

   Our Parent and Toddler group would not donate a toy. They would make decorations, which would either fall apart, or stick to everything in sight, due to the amount of glue involved. Or have poo inside.

   December 7th, 2010 at 10:56 pm
4. Archdruid Eileen says:
   

   1) The vicar has sculpted all his back-sermons into papier-mache baubles. And then hung all his old dog collars up there as well. The Church Wardens have put the person who asks awkward questions at PCC on the top.The Junior Church has hung their toys of all the traditional nativity animals – a goat, a zebra, a lion, a Transformer and a 2nd-hand, rather battered soft-toy hedgehog.

   2) When do Harveys and DFS *not* have a sale? Who makes the toys for Santa’s elves? Which chemical causes the red bio-luminescence in Rudolph’s? Why do people on Eastenders ever wish each other “Happy Christmas”, when logically they’d be looking nervously out of the window to see where the disaster is brewing? What did the Three Wise Men use for sticking up the wrapping paper before the invention of sticky tape?

   December 7th, 2010 at 11:06 pm
5. Rachel says:
   

   This year, maybe you haven’t actually bought a tree – the Messy Churchers have junk-modelled one for you.

   Hanging on it: Hand knitted baubles from the craft group; organic, fairly-traded candy canes from the Traidcraft stall lady; festive gift aid envelopes from the stewardship officer;

   December 7th, 2010 at 11:09 pm
6. zam says:
   

   For the tree: home baking from the coffee morning; baubles made of flash drives from the IT person. vuvuzelas from world Cup attendee

   December 7th, 2010 at 11:42 pm
7. zam says:
   

   Why do we encourage children to sit on a strange man’s lap and accept sweets/gift from said unknown man when for the rest of the year it is ‘Don’t talk to strangers’ let alone sit on their laps?

   December 7th, 2010 at 11:49 pm
8. Seonaid says:
   

   How does the national grid supply the extra electricity needed to power all the lights people put on their houses?
   What happens to the baby doll that is used to play Jesus in the church nativity once Christmas is over?
   What do people do with their Christingle oranges after the service (i.e. 10% eat them, 40% display them until they get mouldy). You could make an christingle into a pie chart.

   December 8th, 2010 at 12:20 am
9. Archdruid Eileen says:
   

   Strips of voile and (battery-powered, non-inflammable) tea lights from the alt.worship planning group.

   December 8th, 2010 at 12:21 am
10. carol says:
    

    the thurifer hangs a tinsle decorated thurible
    the bishop hangs up candy croziers & foil wrapped chocolate mitres
    the acolytes provide tree candles (everlasting / oil filled for safety & budgetary reasons)
    the curate writes desperate cracker jokes while practising sermons
    the flying bishop drops some sparkles but doesnt leave anything substantial as he’s just passsing through en route to Rome
    the ABC & Dr Sentamu put on Tree decorations of themselves as seen on sale at most good Cathedral Gift Shops

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:31 am
11. Rosalind says:
    

    For the tree; hand crafted decorations made from cocktail sticks left behaind after the christingle service (the sweets of course were eaten);
    the vicar’s sermon notes which were put down near the tree while it was being decorated;
    there will be a box by the tree into which flower ladies with a developed aesthetic sense will remove all the decorations that don’t match the colour scheme, and from which the curate will re-decorate the tree at Morning Prayer every day for the 12 days of Christams…

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:57 am
12. Hayley Matthews says:
    

    ‘emo’ church have left weeping theatre masks & soggy tissues
    ‘cafe’ church have left cafetieres for one and a christmas card that you get a stamp on for every person who signs it
    ‘messy’ church have left…in disgust YOU made the tree HUMPH!
    ‘goth’ church have tied an angel with bleeding eyes to the top
    ‘traditional’ church are arguing over whether or not to have the star or an angel
    ‘evo’ church are too busy singing and handing out tracts to bother about such fripperies

    ta da!

    December 8th, 2010 at 1:23 am
13. Hayley Matthews says:
    

    Why mince pies? Why? Aren’t they the devil’s work?

    December 8th, 2010 at 1:38 am
14. Tim says:
    

    Tree: Don’t forget the “mysterious” props for the vicar’s awkward Christmas sermon. Wrapped-up presents are usually a safe bet.

    December 8th, 2010 at 5:20 am
15. Peter says:
    

    The last time our church had a tree it had virtually no needles on it, it looked rather bare shall we say.

    Our school, being closed over Christmas (!), had offered it to us so it was transported the half mile to church on the roof of the Vicars car. Unfortunately they didn’t tie it on, and yes, it fell off on route. Hence the lack of needles.

    December 8th, 2010 at 8:57 am
16. Mary says:
    

    The internet food shop. Whether you will actually get all you ordered for Christmas, or whether key items, like the turkey, the veg, etc get left out and you have to brave the shops for replacements anyhow.

    Last minute Christmas shopping, right up until the doors close on Christmas eve.

    If the corner shop was open on Christmas day, what would you buy? I remember our local one being bemused because someone came in on Christmas Day to buy … washing powder.

    As for items on the Christmas tree. The Lay Reader would decorate the tree in a fetching blue scarf. The crucifer with tiny brass crosses. The child with Aspergers (probably my child!) would have Thomas the Tank Engine decorations, and a train track running round the base of the tree (which the vicar secretly approves of, because he is a model train fanatic!).

    December 8th, 2010 at 9:36 am
17. Russ says:
    

    The stewardship group have hung a ‘Please recycle me’ sign
    The worship group have hung some festive ear plugs
    The welcomers have hung the Green Festive Foam Hand of Welcome
    The church mice have hung some cheese

    December 8th, 2010 at 10:58 am
18. Margaret says:
    

    Why do we have family get togethers at Christmas when it is dark and cold and we are all shut indoors but never invite the same people in the Summer for a barbecue when *maybe* the weather would be nicer?

    Why do we only eat turkey at Christmas?

    Why do we make new year’s resolutions to diet when the house is still full of half eaten boxes of chocolates

    Why do people want to go to church on 26th December when they’ve been several times in the last few days?

    Why do nativity plays always have girls as angels?

    Why do we still have services in our 12th C church building even when the temperature is sub-zero?

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:17 pm
19. Farli says:
    

    Loving all the comments.
    Can’t think of much to add, except that the Mothers’ Union will surely have sneaked their banner in somewhere.
    Miniature BCPs from the Prayer Book Society?

    In one of my churches the Christmas tree is donated by the local undertakers. I wonder if this is meant to drum up more business and, if so, what they have done to it to achieve this end.

    In another small village church we have just had a Christmas tree festival – at least 30 trees of various degrees of plasticity. One of them really was decorated with teabags. There were complaints last year when one of the trees was decorated with wine corks – seemed to be encouraging excessive drinking!

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:18 pm
20. Gregory says:
    

    The church organist has hung 3 Christmas ludes.

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:33 pm
21. Alison says:
    

    Things that baffle me at Christmas: the odd things that are sold as Christmas decorations. For instance what’s Christmassy about peacocks, zebras (and other African animals), fish or various vegetables topped with fake snow, all of which I have recently seen for sale in a huge over the top Christmas display in my local garden centre. I suppose you might conceivably eat the fish and vegetables and at a stretch, you might devise some biblical connection for the fish, but it’s still nothing to do with Christmas.

    December 8th, 2010 at 12:36 pm
22. chris clark says:
    

    The high churchman has put a bell and incense at the top, the evangelical has put some bible tracts at the bottom.

    December 8th, 2010 at 1:00 pm
23. Jaded for Jesus says:
    

    Why, the vicar has hung the organist, of course!

    December 8th, 2010 at 1:56 pm
24. Jen says:
    

    Margaret asked: “In one of my churches the Christmas tree is donated by the local undertakers. I wonder if this is meant to drum up more business and, if so, what they have done to it to achieve this end.”
    Farli said: “Why do we still have services in our 12th C church building even when the temperature is sub-zero?”
    I think these two questions might be related!

    December 8th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
25. Dave says:
    

    Just to say:

    a) Thank you for suggestions thus far – please don’t stop.

    b) There’s lots here that I will be able to include. This really is a huge help to me.

    December 8th, 2010 at 2:40 pm
26. Liz from the sewing room says:
    

    On the tree:

    Wednesday prayer group would put biscuits, most members are old and get given lots of boxes of biscuits each Christmas. They bring them to eat after the meetings.
    The youth group would remove and eat the biscuits, but no-one would mind
    Messy Church would put glitter on it, they love glitter
    The Scouts would put canoes. They had the canoes out last week in the snow!
    The 12 step fellowship would put little cards with The Serenity Prayer written on
    Some of the older, grumpier members would put the childrens’ bands’ instruments on the tree. BUT they are mean and grumpy, and everyone else would take them off the tree and give them back to the children.
    The worship leaders would include the tree in the intercessions, and look for its hands in order to shake one at the end of the service
    The people who cook lunch on Wednesdays might put left over roast potatoes on, when I left this afternoon they were wondering what to do with them. (it was a lovely Christmas lunch!!)
    The office staff would put the printer on in the hope it might work again after a spell on the tree
    The coeliac members would put a list of wheat and barley derivatives on!
    The toddlers wouldnt put anything on, but they may take something off and wander around with it, but no-one would mind as long as they didnt hurt themselves.
    Oh – and there would have to be some hotpot put on by someone or other!

    Strange Christmas Traditions:

    Singing carols in the open air in the freezing cold. People would notice it far more if we sang them outside in the July sunshine when we were warm!

    We have a Christmas noticeboard at church, the idea is that everyone puts one card to everyone on it, instead of sending cards to everyone, and gives the money they would have spent on cards to charity. So WHY do people put a card on the board and STILL send one to everyone in church!

    December 8th, 2010 at 4:13 pm
27. Christine Smith says:
    

    I have a friend who collects nativity sets but her best one she makes herself. It’s called ‘The Whole Universe Real and Imagined Comes to the Crib’ and she’s got everything in it: the Queen riding side saddle, Cruella de Vil – anyone she can buy a figure of. All her young relations can add whatever they got for Christmas to it – sp peacocks, zebras and vegetables have their place too!

    December 8th, 2010 at 4:42 pm
28. Here are the notices » The Cartoon Blog by Dave Walker says:
    

    [...] Christmas cartoon ideas  27 Christine Smith, Liz from the sewing room, Dave, Jen, Jaded for Jesus, chris clark [...] [...]

    December 8th, 2010 at 5:40 pm
29. Kathryn says:
    

    The choir would leave, perhaps not on the tree but near it, a box of tissues and a half-used container of throat lozenges dating from 1963. I don’t know where these come from but have never seen them run out.

    Someone is sure to have an argument about when the tree goes up, how long it stays up and so on. You may end up with a Jesse tree during Advent as an alternative, but people will get confused and put Christmas decorations on it.

    The ecology group will try to house a hedgehog under the tree, or perhaps a family of squirrels within it. This gets messy.

    There must be at least one decoration that nobody actually likes but which was lovingly donated by the previous-incumbent-but-one’s cousin’s husband, and which must nnot be removed from the tree for fear of hurting someone’s feelings.

    December 8th, 2010 at 6:04 pm
30. Sarah says:
    

    The Leprosy Mission hangs a piece of dead skin (yuk maybe not!)

    The Reader hangs a pair of spectacles

    The organist hangs an organ (a little used one, like an appendix for example)

    December 8th, 2010 at 6:45 pm
31. Sarah says:
    

    The cell group would add cells for a snowy effect. Dandruff would do it.
    Many of the congregation could add to this.

    December 8th, 2010 at 6:47 pm
32. Pam Smith says:
    

    What baffles me about Christmas is how it is always too early to send cards/wrap presents/buy tree and then it suddenly becomes almost too late. There doesn’t seem to be any point that is just the right point to do these things. Or maybe it’s just me.

    Christmas presents – perhaps those prizes that keep turning up in every church raffle could be converted to decorations?

    eg

    a) The purple sixties style plastic shoulder bag. May have been rescued from a dressing up box.

    b) The talc and body lotion set, box slightly dogeared by now, by an the important sounding but actually unknown Fansterman’s Fine Fragrances of Bond Street

    c) A set of stainless steel cutlery in a blister pack.

    Etc

    December 9th, 2010 at 12:30 pm
33. Pip says:
    

    The carols by candlelight – everyone gets a blob of wax on their best warm coat, someone’s child will need a wee every 5 minutes, no-one can see the carol sheet in the gloom, at some point a candlestick will fall over to horrified gasps (one year missing the churchwarden by an inch), the church has 400 times as many people in it than on the average Sunday (largely because of the “do” afterwards), the vicar will berate the congregation for not being that big the rest of the year, some embarrassed teenagers will be coerced into standing by the crib, and best of all half of the congregation laugh meanly at, and the other half affectionately with, the organists very deliberate musical joke (a truly crass modulation at the end of “Oh come all ye faithful”). Afterwards the village elder-statesladies will grasp our elbows and we’ll feel all warm again. Aww.

    December 10th, 2010 at 12:33 am