
If you’ve ever wondered what clergy keep under their cassock then my cassock cartoon may help. Click that link for the full version. This picture is from The Exciting World of Churchgoing, the paper version of the book of the same name.
I have you, the commenters on this blog, to thank for this cartoon. On 8 January 2008 I asked for help on the subject, and was overwhelmed with good ideas. So thank you.
Posted by Dave at 10:27 pm on October 20, 2010 and filed under Cartoons, Church.
4 Comments

To find out what these churchgoers are looking at take a look at the full cartoon, entitled (thereby possibly giving the answer away), the parish computer.
I thought this was an appropriate picture for the start of this week given that everyone is talking about ‘Christianity and new media’ etc. Advanced practitioners need to remember that there are many of us for whom making our computers do basic tasks like turning on, writing words, connecting to the internet, making tea etc, is still a daily struggle. Also when our computers are turned on making ourselves do basic tasks, like moving pieces of paper from one pile to another, doing our diagrams, etc, is also a daily struggle. I could go on.
[3 paragraphs of rambling on the subject of computers deleted because it was rubbish.]
You can find this cartoon in the book The Exciting World of Churchgoing.
Posted by Dave at 6:03 pm on October 18, 2010 and filed under Cartoons, New CartoonChurch cartoons.
4 Comments
It has been quite a weekend. First of all on Friday evening the Christian Blog (and other internet things) Awards, where I was awarded a ‘joint second best Christian blog’ certificate, with which I am very happy. I have to say that it was a rather impossible category to judge given the very different nature and purposes of the finalists’ blogs, all of which are good in their own ways. Congratulations to Jenny Baker of the Sophia Network who was the blogging winner.
Then yesterday to the internet conference, where I mingled with interesting people, gained inspiration of various kinds, chatted with friends and went to the pub. I’ll perhaps post some reflections about things I learnt through the mediums of rambling and diagrams at some future point.
Back to the awards: I’d like to say thank you to all readers for the 110% efforts that you have been putting in over the last six weeks. But now that we’re not trying to win an award I think it is time to declare an ‘era of slackness’, where the following are permitted:
- Ill thought out-comments, perhaps with occasional lapses in grammar and spelling
- The posting of comments whilst wearing gardening attire or a ratty old bathrobe (thanks Anne for the latter suggestion)
- Content that doesn’t really mention Christianity
- Whilst I, as blogger, pledge to continue to post regularly, occasional lapses in quality will be permitted. For instance, I may post shopping lists found in my supermarket trolley for collective analysis.
Shopping list found in my supermarket trolley
This has been posted for collective analysis.

Questions for study groups
What is ‘cross’
The apple puree. For a child, or pork?
The list writer. Male or female?
Yes, I do deliberately choose shopping trolleys that have other people’s shopping lists left in them.
Posted by Dave at 8:16 pm on October 17, 2010 and filed under Blogging, Utter nonsense, shopping lists.
26 Comments

Tonight it is Christian New Media Awards in London, and I’m very pleased to say that we (my wife and I) have been invited along. When thinking about Christian awards events I’m always aware of the ever so slight irony (‘whosoever shalt exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted’ (Matthew 23), see diagram above), but it is a privilege to be asked to this one again and I’m looking forward to it greatly. Thanks to everyone for your contributions without which the invitation would not have been forthcoming. I might do a spot of twittering about it, we shall see. I have plans to wear my Lambeth Conference ’08 tie (purple, mitres, croziers) tonight in order to convert others to Anglicanism through subtle means*.
Tomorrow (Saturday) is the Christian New Media Conference, to which I am also going. There will be various speakers talking about advanced computing techniques and whathaveyou**. It should be a great day. You can follow proceedings on Twitter via the #cnmac10 hashtag.
Afterwards there will be a bit of a pub gathering that one or two of us are organising, to which anyone is welcome. The plan is to go to the Crown Tavern in Clerkenwell Green when the event ends, which I think is about 5.30. The best postcode for directions is EC1R 0DP (not the pub postcode, which takes you to an adjacent street). The pub is 8 minutes from the conference venue and 12 from the tube (Chancery Lane (Central) or Angel (Northern). Please note that there is no Circle line tomorrow.
* Joke, though I will guide them through the creeds and the 39 Articles if asked.
** You should read the programme really – don’t take my word for anything.
Posted by Dave at 3:55 pm on October 15, 2010 and filed under Cartoons.
6 Comments

A rumour has sprung forth that I have been elected to General Synod. I received the following e-mail from my vicar following a conversation on the subject: ‘Most of the Chelmsford Diocese seems to think you are on it and I was so convinced by them that I’ve put it in the Notice Sheet! OOOPs!’
This is dissatisfactory state of affairs because once something is in the Notice Sheet it more or less becomes true by nature of the stature of the publication. If I am not careful it will become the talk of the parish and I will have to attend services this Sunday in person just so as to convince people that the Notice Sheet is not infallible.
I’d therefore like to take this opportunity to reassure readers that (a) I am not on General Synod, and (b) I am not the Bishop of Dudley, David Walker. To friends of the Bishop of Dudley, David Walker, I’d like to say (1) He is on General Synod, and (2) he is not me.
I hope this clears things up.
The list of who is actually on General Synod is kept on a list maintained by Peter Owen. As you can see I am not on it. It is not the official list, but it might as well be as everyone refers to it, including the officials who organise General Synod. I myself have typed ‘Peter Owen Synod’ into Google about twelve times today just to check whether I was on General Synod. If Peter wanted to cause synodical havoc he would be ideally placed to do so. I on the other hand, am hoping to learn about saving bookmarks at this Saturday’s Advanced Christian Computing Conference. More about that later.
Update: Notice that will appear in our church notice sheet:

Posted by Dave at 7:53 am on October 15, 2010 and filed under Anglican goings-on, Church, Essex Life.
11 Comments

I’ve added a new cartoon to CartoonChurch.com – it is entitled the social committee, and can be found here. The extract above is pretty nonsensical, but these days I like to put some kind of illustration in ach blog post even if it is meaningless. This cartoon, like all of the new CartoonChurch ones this week, is taken from the book The Exciting World of Churchgoing, available from shops.
If you haven’t been able to keep up with the various cartoons I’ve been posting over the last few weeks you can find links to them all here.
Posted by Dave at 7:55 am on October 14, 2010 and filed under Cartoons, New CartoonChurch cartoons.
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Today’s cartoon is entitled ‘Numbers’ – this is one quarter of it, see the full version here. There are instructions on that page if you’d like to do things like republish it, etc. This cartoon is taken from the latest book, the Exciting World of Churchgoing.
While I’m writing I’d just like to mention the people who responded to my rather grumpy tweet earlier, which I made after (among other things) discovering that the only review (by Leone from Lancashire) of my latest calendar on Amazon gave it one star out of five. Thanks to everyone who responded with extra reviews and clicking of buttons to improve my calendar rating to 4.5 stars, which is as much as one would dare to hope for from any calendar. It was very kind of you. This now makes this calendar my most reviewed item, the books having received somewhere between zero and one reviews each. So – thank you!
Posted by Dave at 6:01 pm on October 12, 2010 and filed under Cartoons, Church.
2 Comments

Why do people make notes during the sermon? Find out in the latest cartoon I’ve uploaded to CartoonChurch.com, entitled Making notes. This one is from the new book, the Exciting World of Churchgoing. I’ve even created a new section for cartoons from that book, and all being well they will appear daily this week (Mondays-Fridays only).
I make notes all the time. Even at dinner parties. I don’t find I get invited to a lot of dinner parties these days. No idea why.
I have about three notebooks on the go at any one time, and multiple sheets of paper / napkins / service sheets. A lot of these I lose, or they end up in big piles of paper which are then (once a year) transferred to big files of paper. Sometimes I look through the big files but all I find are sheets of paper with nonsensical scribbles on them. It is a system that has never failed not to work.
Hope you enjoy the cartoons this week. Feel free to send me ideas on (unused) napkins – address on the left there (or right, I forget).
Posted by Dave at 7:48 pm on October 11, 2010 and filed under Cartoons, Church, New CartoonChurch cartoons.
3 Comments
Being as it’s Saturday and noone is reading I thought I’d publish some of the letters I get that, for one reason or another, don’t make it into the comments pages of this blog.
Althea:
Thankyou lots, I am obliged to announce that your blog is excellent!
Thank you Althea. I’m sure your blog is excellent too!
Hearst:
Hi There, I just spent a little time reading through your posts, which I found entirely by mistake whilst researching one of my projects. Please continue to write more because it’s unusual that someone has something interesting to say about this. Will be waiting for more!
Hearst – bless you! I’m glad that I was able to help you whilst you were looking for information for your archdeacon project. You’re right – the amount of really dull stuff out there on the subject of archdeacons is incredible. As soon as I write another interesting archdeacon post I’ll make sure you’re the first to hear about it.
Kerry:
The content on this publish is really a single of the very best material that We have ever are available across. I love your publish, I’ll occur back to verify for new posts.
Oh Kerry, you have quite a way with words. I’ll watch out for your reoccurrence the next time I make a publish.
Ezekiel Malinky:
Precisely saying thanks won’t just be enough, for your unparalleled lucidity in your own authoring.
Ezekiel – brilliant! I couldn’t have said it better.
Minerva:
When i was simply reasoning that there are a lot improperly stuff on that theme and yourself basically altered my personal attitude.
Minerva – I know! The improperly stuff on reversible knees irritates me too. But it is good to hear that my blogging has made such a difference in your life.
Toshiko:
Hello! Is it okay if I go a bit off topic? …
No.
Posted by Dave at 12:13 pm on October 9, 2010 and filed under Blogging, Mundane, Utter nonsense.
9 Comments

Important footnotes
This diagram is not for one moment supposed to be me complaining about how difficult my life is. I am fully aware that my life is not difficult and that I am very lucky to have my own office, a radio etc.
It is, perhaps, a commentary on the plight of the creative freelancer, balancing ‘the need for stimulation against the need for isolation’ (tweet by Hugh @gapingvoid).
I find I get a lot more done during the two days a week I now spend at the Church Times offices surrounded by newsroom sounds and goings-on, but were I to be there all the time I doubt I’d ever draw any cartoons.
I was thinking of doing a little video showing the exciting features of my HQ – I nearly did it today, but it feels a bit strange talking to oneself. Well, actually it feels quite normal, but I don’t usually do it on video. Let me know if there’s any aspects you have a particular interest in, such as the ‘antique’ wooden dresser in the kitchen or views of the corridors.
Posted by Dave at 5:25 pm on October 8, 2010 and filed under Cartooning, Cartoons, Starting a Business.
3 Comments

[You can repost this cartoon on a personal blog. Just link back to this site - thank you.]
Posted by Dave at 10:21 pm on October 6, 2010 and filed under Cartoons.
7 Comments

These are the waterproof trousers I’m considering for my thrice-weekly commute into the heart of industrial Basildon.
My main question is whether I need the articulated knees. I think I probably need them for the extra movement, but any advice welcomed.
Yes, that is it. I call that a blog post. Good thing it’s Wednesday evening and no-one is reading.
Posted by Dave at 9:47 pm on October 6, 2010 and filed under Utter nonsense.
17 Comments