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August 4th, 2009

Holiday photograph 2: Bathing in Brixham Harbour

bathing in brixham harbour

Readers tuning in hoping for a picture of me bathing in Brixham Harbour will, I’m afraid, be sadly disappointed.

I think all right minded people would agree that bathing in Brixham Harbour should be severely frowned upon. But it is the illegality of the ‘attempted bathing’ that presents one of the great moral issues of our time. One imagines that such bathing attempts might fail for various reasons – ill fitting bathing costume, inability to find a suitable locker for valuables, the presence of green slime that only became apparent upon scaling the harbour wall, etc.

My travelling companion was vehement that such attempts should be outlawed in the same way that waving a gun around in a bank is not really the done thing. But I am of the school of thought that says that failed bathing attempts should be allowed for the amusement of the general public, as long as they do not pass that thin line between ‘attempted bathing’ and ‘bathing’.

What do you think? I have added a poll (left) in order to test the mind of the international community on this matter.

16 Comments »



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16 Responses to “Holiday photograph 2: Bathing in Brixham Harbour”


  1. Mike Peatman says:

    I think the key here, Dave, is to love the bather, but hate the sin of attempted bathing ;)

    August 4th, 2009 at 9:41 am
  2. Phil Ritchie says:

    I fear that we are heading for a two track solution on this one. Bathers are clearly on the outer track but attempted bathers are on the inner track unless and until they successfully bathe. The question is does one consider an attempted bather as impaired?

    August 4th, 2009 at 10:02 am
  3. Chris Carnall says:

    Brilliant, both!

    Clearly we need a listening process …

    August 4th, 2009 at 10:15 am
  4. Leon says:

    We must also consider the issue of the fine line between attempted bathing and not even attempting to bathe. If someone’s standard bathing procedure means they check for byelaws banning attempted bathing after they’ve changed into their bathing costume and found somewhere secure for their valuables, but before they check for green slime and actually climb into the water, have they done anything wrong?

    August 4th, 2009 at 10:30 am
  5. Chris Carnall says:

    Also, I understand that there are those who, in all conscience, cannot condone mixed bathing.

    (See the recent innovative solution adopted in Blackburn Harbour)

    August 4th, 2009 at 10:31 am
  6. Margaret Thornton says:

    Would someone loitering by the harbour in a swimming costume just catching the sunshine be at risk of the ‘attempting to bathe’ bye law?

    (Of course current weather renders this possibility very unlikely…)

    August 4th, 2009 at 11:09 am
  7. Chris Clark says:

    The Eunuch was travelling near Brixham harbour when he was joined by Philip…….”look there is much water here, what prevents me from being baptised?” “you might be breaking the by-laws”..referred to the Bishop for a ruling…

    Have a great holiday Dave… the train ride to Dartmouth is great fun if a little expensive.

    August 4th, 2009 at 11:45 am
  8. Raspberry Rabbit says:

    I think this is probably so that the harbourmaster, the police or Brixham Council goons could nab you while you are on the way to the harbourfront with your old-fashioned swimming costume, your inflatable rubber ring and your snorkel. The fact that you’re not yet in the water would not be an excuse for avoiding a fixed penalty ticket.

    August 4th, 2009 at 12:13 pm
  9. Ann Memmott says:

    One envisages said person in Victorian bloomer-style bathing costume boldly leaping from the bottom step and finding out that the tide’s out. A clear case of Attempted Bathing that needs to be punished with a severe bout of laughing at them.

    August 4th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
  10. Rory says:

    Well, Dave. Attempted bathing is a vexed issue that I’m sure we’ve all struggled with from time to time. Perhaps we can turn to scripture for enlightenment?

    But I say to you that everyone who looks at a speedo with disgust has already bathed in Brixton harbour in their heart.

    Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him and he sat down and began to teach them. The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in attempting to bathe in Brixton harbour; and making her stand before all of them, they said to him, ‘Teacher, this woman was caught in the very act of attempting to bathe. Now in the law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?’ They said this to test him, so that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, ‘Let anyone among you who does not own a bathing suit be the first to throw a stone at her.’

    Of course all of this raises the deper question of the relationship between law and grace:

    What then are we to say? Should we continue in sin in order that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin go on living in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been bathed into Christ Jesus were bathed into his death? Therefore we have been buried with him by bathing into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life.

    Certainly food for thought.

    August 4th, 2009 at 11:21 pm
  11. SWegman says:

    Looks like a couple of handprints beside the sign as the last bather made a desperate attempt to get out of the water. Suppose he/she placed the sign?

    August 5th, 2009 at 6:04 am
  12. Pax Vobiscum says:

    I do like the neat surrealist touch in Rory’s biblical bathing exegesis, transposing ‘Brixton’ harbour for ‘Brixham’. I guess the Greek is not clear here.

    August 5th, 2009 at 7:40 am
  13. Daniel says:

    Perhaps the preceding 56 bylaws would shed some light on this important matter.

    If attempting to bathe is a crime can one commit the offense of attempting to attempt to bathe?

    August 5th, 2009 at 11:53 am
  14. Ken says:

    This brings up the legal questions: is all bathing premeditated? Can one be found guilty of conspiracy to commit bathing? This subject if fraught with legal portend and far-reaching implications. Thank you, Dave, for provoking this discussion of great social import.

    August 10th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
  15. Edwin Beckham says:

    Dave, how dare you attempt to “test the mind of the international community” on this delicate issue with such a blunt and democratic instrument as a poll. You well know that this is not how good theology is done (Nicea and a couple of other important gatherings of bishops excepted), nor moral and ethical argument leading to good public policy. I second the call for a listening process and a minimum of 40 years of academic and practical work on the question. Meantime, the local authorities will have to be trusted to draw the fine line between attempted bathing and bathing. We can pray they at least have good taste.

    August 25th, 2009 at 11:57 am
  16. Nefertiki says:

    First I would like to say that the nature or extent of the bathing costume does not come into it. This is because the attire at formal social gatherings and dare I say th`e dansants is often briefer than, and even resembles many a bathing costume.

    Furthermore, perhaps the narrow line between attempted and actual bathing should be, does the costume remain dry? Any so-called attempt at bathing which leaves the attempter dry should mean that the soul is without sin. I am now wondering whether a distinction between “damp” and “dry” should be made? And should those words apply to both the costume and the skin? Dear me, always more questions than answers.

    One more thing: as a member of more communities (some imaginary and/or invisible) than I can shake a stick at, I do indeed resent having my fragile and endangered mind tested. However I give you free rein to test my mettle.

    September 13th, 2009 at 10:39 pm