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June 26th, 2007

Incline thine ear

incline thine ear

Owing to various problems I went to the doctor. I told the doctor that I thought my problems might be connected to my ears, so he took a look and told me that perhaps my ears and my problems might be connected.

To tell the end of a long story: I am going to have my right ear syringed tomorrow. I went a week ago and had it done, but it did not really work, so I am going back for another go.

In order to prepare for the aforementioned procedure it is necessary to put olive oil into your ear thrice daily for a week. Two drops a time, making a total of 42 drops. I have done it for two weeks, so 84 drops. If I am to be honest I have quite often forgotten, so I put 6 drops in at the end of the day so that my overall droppage is still what it should be.

In the olden days olive oil was placed in ones ear using a teaspoon and a shaky hand. It was quite difficult and often meant olive oil on the face, hair and carpet. Nowadays you go to the chemist for a special dropper. It is a lot easier and means that you will only get oil over your face and carpet.

It is important to incline your ear after you have applied the olive oil, otherwise it will run straight back out onto your face, hair and carpet (as in the days of the teaspoon). It is best to continue tilting for a number of minutes or for as long as you can be bothered to be so inclined. The diagrams above show some of the postures I have been adopting over the last two weeks whilst trying to make olive oil soak into my inner ear. Hopefully this will explain a thing or two.

Message to people seeking invoices / replies / answers: I’m going to try really hard to get up to date within the next 48 hours, though some of this work may be delivered at an angle of between 30 and 45 degrees.

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22 Responses to “Incline thine ear”


  1. Sarah B says:

    That is a-cute angle not to be confused with a cute angel as seen on popular Christmas cards… or am I getting too obtuse?

    June 27th, 2007 at 12:00 am
  2. Karin says:

    My ear problems seem connected to sinuses so I take something to dry up the sinuses and it usually does the trick for my ears, so if the syringe thing doesn’t work for you then mallow tablets or Sudafed or something like that might be the answer.

    June 27th, 2007 at 7:55 am
  3. Chris Clark says:

    Nice to hear you wax lyrical Dave..

    Hope it goes well

    June 27th, 2007 at 9:45 am
  4. MadPriest says:

    Hi Dave
    May I suggest that if the syringe doesn’t do the trick this time that you try an industrial grade pressure washer. Just stick the hose in the gunky ear and turn it on – full power. You should find that this will clear any blockage you may have between the ears. They are relatively cheap to buy but if it’s only a one off situation you could rent one for the day from The Hire Shop. Be careful though, it is very likely there will be some spillage of water/old olive oil/brains on the carpet.

    June 27th, 2007 at 9:55 am
  5. Jack the Lass says:

    People think I’m very strange when I tell them I love having my ears syringed. It’s so therapeutic. Though everything is very loud afterwards.

    I should add I only get it done when necessary, not just for the sake of the experience.

    June 27th, 2007 at 9:59 am
  6. yay says:

    If you get a piece of cotton wool and put some vaseline on it and wedge it in your ear after your oil drops, then you may be able to make your head less inclined. Perhaps 20 degrees from vertical?

    June 27th, 2007 at 10:28 am
  7. Ellen says:

    I once got in a pickle because I made the oil too hot – had to go to casualty with burnt inner ear. Please don’t take an risks with hot oil. nasty.

    June 27th, 2007 at 10:52 am
  8. jody says:

    is the oil supposed to be hot? I just droppered some cold oil in – in fact I think it was ‘ear drops’ from the chemist, rather than olive oil – but it was definitely cold, anyway.

    is it just me or is there an inordinately high number of people who read this blog who have had to have their ears syringed?

    I have to add that I only have had to have this done once, and I attribute it to being addicted to cleaning my ears with cotton buds and doing exactly what it says not to do on the packet, sticking it in my ears.

    I am now no longer addicted.

    June 27th, 2007 at 10:56 am
  9. ash says:

    I had to do this for a while too, although I didn’t see a doctor/ need my ears syringed. That’s what first-year medical student friends are for: dodgey advice… but slightly better, perhaps, than some wives’ tales. Unless they are medical student wives.

    Anyway, yes, I empathise.

    June 27th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
  10. Clare says:

    I have never had my ears syringed (though I too thought that maybe cotton wool would stop the oil leaking out.)

    Maybe I should. Would everything seem terribly loud then though.

    June 27th, 2007 at 1:21 pm
  11. Dave says:

    For me the hearing aspect is not really an issue – I can hear just as well in the affected ear as I can through the other one. It is more to do with possible infection that might or might be in the ear.

    It is not something that you should have done unless you need it though – they warn you that there is a risk if a pierced eardrum, which is not something you really want.

    June 27th, 2007 at 1:30 pm
  12. Dave says:

    Also I have never heard of putting hot oil in. That does indeed sound inadvisable. As does MadPriest’s advice, just in case you are surfing in via Google looking for things to try.

    June 27th, 2007 at 1:32 pm
  13. Ellen says:

    yep. really learn from my experience – DON’T PUT HOT OIL IN YOUR EAR!!! I once met a ‘man of the road’ who told me that they only thing to put in your ear was your elbow…good advice I think.

    June 27th, 2007 at 2:26 pm
  14. Simo says:

    Jack the Lass – i don’t think your strange, i have only had to have it done once when i was about 8 or 9 so a long time ago but i seam to remember actually quite liking it!
    Dave, rather than the dropper how about using one of the spray olive oils you can get from the super market, you might get the hair and face a bit, not enough in the ear but because of the fine spray the carpet should be ok!

    June 27th, 2007 at 2:58 pm
  15. Anne says:

    If the cold oil is unpleasant, you could try just gently warming the bottle up under warm tapwater until it’s just a little above room temperature. I used to do that with the babes when they needed ear drops. Whatever you end up doing, I hope you feel better soon.
    Anne

    June 27th, 2007 at 3:04 pm
  16. Pam says:

    I know this dates me, but I remember when you didn’t just go to the chemist for a special dropper – you bought the olive oil there too in a tiny bottle! You only saw olive oil for food use in up-market delicatessens – there weren’t any of those where I lived as a child.
    Hope your ear feels better soon, Dave.

    June 27th, 2007 at 3:22 pm
  17. chris says:

    ah, the joy of hearing well again after having a muffled wax- induced sound experience. what’s annoying is when you waggle your ear, the wax moves inside the ear just enough to clear it slightly, you can hear clearly again, then it closes up again resulting in the muffled state once more.

    may i recommend ‘audiclean’ spray instead of olive oil?

    ta

    June 27th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
  18. Mary says:

    For some reason, I can’t fathom why, your cartoon reminds me of Mr Benn…

    June 27th, 2007 at 7:43 pm
  19. Jack the Lass says:

    Clare, I was advised that cotton wool is actually not a good thing to use, as it soaks up the olive oil that is supposed to be gradually soaking into the plug of wax (now there’s a delightful image for you).

    Simo, thank you for confirming that I’m not strange. The next time someone tells me I am I shall point them your way.

    June 27th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
  20. Philip of samaria says:

    scary – I have been deafish in one ear for 4 -5 weeks now – not wax as I 1st thought and now on various tablets and drops… people in church have prayed but no improvement yet…

    immediately think of Isaiah and ‘this people with ears who do not hear’ or is it who hear and do not understand or both? Must lok it up anyway I connect to ‘a stiff necked people’ cos when you keep bending your neck to listen cos you dont hear your neck she get stiff…

    June 27th, 2007 at 8:16 pm
  21. ee says:

    I once wrote a Parable of Ear Irrigation.

    (hope the link worked, I’m not very good with links).

    June 28th, 2007 at 10:48 am
  22. MadPriest says:

    I prefer the word “experimental” rather than “inadvisable.” I admit I have never tried this method myself and you would be a guinea pig. But if it’s successful just think of the accolades you will receive. Hey, it may even become known as the “Dave Walker Procedure” or summat like that.

    June 28th, 2007 at 3:53 pm